Chapter 3: The Villain of the Story
Some call me the man with two faces. Others have referred to me as either a demon or an angel, depending on the occasion. There even exists a time and a place beyond the horizon of reality where one could beckon me by my given name. Although few would dare travel there in these dark times. That I made them this way to curb the urge to visit there was purposeful, of course. These days any who see me know me as Achromatic. Achro, for those who found ten letter names a touch too difficult. As I looked at the two creatures in front of me I was afraid one letter might have left them stumped. While mashing their brain cells together to conjure a thought, at that. The pair of them looked boring. I hate when creatures bore me. One man. One woman. I dreaded how boring this was bound to be. Alas, duty called.
Their flesh was a sharp contrast to mine which was quite pale. The woman was the darker skinned of the two, with glistening skin. She wore dreadlocks on either side of her from what looked to be an impossible angle. Sunglasses covered her eyes. They were in my estimation the nicest thing about her aesthetic. She had on a small pair of headphones which were a prelude to a much bigger pair. I did not know if they held a use or if the woman thought them fashionable. I was not going to ask. The man by contrast looked straight out of a steampunk novel. From the small gadgets adorning him to his hat which was all very cliche. Harmless enough to the eyes though. It was evident that he was older than the woman, judging by his well maintained beard with gray streaks.
“Names?” I asked. They looked between each other. The pair looked nervous. I did not bother to let them know that the time for their survival instinct to ring the alarm was long past. It would only make this encounter even more boring than it was already going to be.
The woman turned out to be the more confident of the two so she spoke first. “My name is Rhymera-”
“Don’t care,” I interrupted. “I meant your title. What is it that you do in this world.”
The one who referred to herself as Rhymera gulped. “Rapper, sir,” She said in a quiet voice.
I felt a tingle shoot down my spine. I did enjoy the ring of ‘sir’ when it addressed me. Not enough to relieve my boredom, but it was better than what most offered me. “Are you any good? At rapping?” I asked. Curious to see the depth of perception this one had.
The Rapper grinned. “Yes! One of the best! Few can match my quick wit, those who challenge me prove unfit!” She finished with an awkward and overdone pose.
No depth to that perception at all then, got it. “I see. Would you like the chance to win a fortune? The gamble would be something of equal value. All you must do is defeat me in your chosen art of rap. Your answer?”
The Rapper nodded. “Yes! No one can match skill my lyrics aint got any chill!” she said with an almost stunning amount of enthusiasm. I was inoculated from being stunned by the fact that such displays by fools were all too common.
“We have a deal then,” I said. “One moment as I open the time ways and process the result.” I pressed a few runes in the air that only I could see and began to hum a short tune to myself. This usually didn’t take long.
“What?” the Rapper asked. Or muttered. Not too sure on that one.
A pleasant dinging sound surrounded the three of us as the process was complete. I looked at the data pouring forth in front of me.
“I have received 14 billion votes across all of reality. You received none. Not even a pity vote. Tut tut, not as skilled as you thought I am afraid,” I said. The mocking at this juncture was not necessary but I enjoyed it all the same.
The Rapper took a step back. “W-we didn’t even do anything yet!” she said, desperation in her voice as she tugged at the bigger pair of earphones.
“Wrong. I played this scenario out countless times, or close enough. Statistically relevant at any rate. You always lose to me. There exists no place where you are my equal in the art of rap. That is the reality of your existence: you are inferior to me in what you believe you do best. There are no mistakes made. No errors in need of rectifying. You are simply not good enough to stand in my presence. Any final words?” I tilted my head. She looked like she was going into shock. A common reaction to the news of one’s failure in my experience.
“Can I challenge you to a battle of wits?” she asked, voice tinged with a naive hopefulness only a boring creature could manage.
“Pass.” I flicked my wrist and the Rapper exploded into a fine red mist. It splattered onto the other boring creature who let out a scream. I rolled my eyes. It was all atoms in the end, why get worked up?"
“Name?” I asked. I waited a few beats and when I got no response I coughed into my hand as thunderous sounds crashed all around us. This appeared to knock the man out of his stupor. “Name?” I repeated.
“L-lego,” he said.
I blinked.
“Come again?” I was beginning to wonder if I had finally lost my mind. Enough creatures had told me this was the case that maybe it finally manifested.
“M-my name is L-lego,” he said again.
I looked at him. Really looked at him. A stare, if you will. At some point
“M-my name is L-lego,” he said again.
I looked at him. Really looked at him. A stare, if you will. At some point I imagine it turned into a glare. Yes, it was true that he was the one referred to as ‘Lego’ in some context. That was not his essential truth though. I sniffed the air twice and allowed the subtle aromas of the environment to invade me. I needed to only search for a brief moment before the answer popped into my mind. There it was. There was this Lego’s true face.
“You forgot the fun part,” I said, now a bit more cheer in my voice. This wasn’t as boring as I had feared. “Lego the Jester is your full name.”
The man, somber before, grinned back at me. “Ah, can’t fool your eye can I? Alas. The gears of fate have already turned and my victory has come. Death has greeted me, true and true, but through it I am exalted forever!” He began to dance in place as he spoke.
Arrogance dripped from the man. It disgusted me. I did not like to be among things that disgusted me for very long. “Are you sure?” I asked, my voice light. There was no betrayal of what my mind focused on.
“Yes! Very sure indeed,” the Jester said as smug as one could. To him, his victory had already happened and all that remained was to collect the prize.
“Alright,” I said. I snapped my fingers and a number appeared over the Jester’s head. The number was almost as big as the man, and it read in deep purple color “27.”
The Jester stopped his motion and glanced upward. “What is this?” he asked.
“The weight of your failure, but of course,” I said.
“I… don’t understand? My body feels funny. As if I have robbed of something important,” he said, his face blank as he tried to understand.
“Mhm,” I agreed. “I shattered the illusion which fed the delusion that your victory was anything but a preclusion. Is this too much of an allusion? Have I caused you some confusion? Worry not, I tire of your intrusion. Have no fear you simple fool, your story has reached its conclusion!”
My voice was booming by the end. It wasn’t just loud, however, but violent. I watch as blood poured down the man’s face from his ears, eyes, nose, and finally mouth. It was beautiful. His death did not take long, but it was painful. As befits an unfunny jester.
It was time to get back to work. There were always such interesting places to visit.
Day Four has Started and ends at September 7th, 2023 at 7:00 PM EST (I dont know how to do clocks I just realized lol)
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im nominating may barring niche circumstances (pigeon role getting revived and someone wants to argue to use the ladder, i wouldnt use it though)
hazard block my role again
if possible dont give may opportunity to be funny and get chop immunity
Impossible
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(I don’t have Deviant abilities anymore now that I’m Emperor)
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Also I’m pretty sure it’s Eliza
Animal went way way out of their way to communicate all of the damn time that they thought Eliza was Jester, and we know for a fact that that’s not true now, and they also sabotaged the ladder despite being generally townread at the time (at least by me). I think they were saving their teammates
Teammate singular. Whatever
I show up solely to read achro’s daily posts at day start
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Can bean roleswap with the dead and give us a 3 shot execution?
oh thats good
also yeah eliza is possible. im afraid of them being the jester
i would propose to the rest of the town that may ought to go today, and maybe chop some other safe non-jester target on day 5, and chop eliza on the final day allowed - day 6. or day 5
Pigeon was the Jester??
he wasn’t, why would i trust that message? there’s no post requirement written in the jester rolecard and its an open setup
i thought their votes will become 0 as my ability says
apparently Achro is above my jail