i dont have tangibld suggestions because its not something i’m very good at but its my thoughts
1 Like
ok i do want to ask did you actually talk to any of the mods directly about this
i don’t want to assume you didn’t but i feel like a surprising amount of people dont think to do it
this reads like a triple a dystopian novel
1 Like
I had a much different issue going on post-Singers FM, and mods were in the thread, attempting to convey my thoughts directly would’ve fallen upon deaf ears and felt more like I was forcing a move from them, I stated this directly to the mods on the last time I flagged a post, I’m not interested in something occurring, I just don’t want people to make a mistake, I had no clue it would spiral until way after when I was drunk and when I was dealing with my own ban, feels slightly ironic to call upon mods that are in the thread.
This isn’t a post directly about toxicity, it’s only part of it, sure making it sound cooler may have missed the point, but a large portion of it is the lack of a human aspect that gets conveyed throughout posts, so it made sense
my argument is that ultimately toxicity and “showing more humanity” go hand in hand. If everyone showed the full range of their feelings about a game all the time, very mean things would get said. It’s a bit of a tradeoff, and I think its a good idea to find alternate ways of expressing emotions on the negative end of that range that don’t make ppl in game get hurt or uncomf
2 Likes
speak for yourself
8 Likes
There is an extent to which showing emotional restraint goes hand in hand with existing productively in a community. I can get Unbelievably Tilted after games end, and, like, it’s not wrong of me to experience those emotions, but it would be harmful to the community for me to express them, because it would hurt other people. So I try* not to, and keep the more hardcore frustration to private spaces with friends. I don’t think suppression of emotions in and of itself is an issue. Being measured and “professional” and a bit “robotic” is normal, to an extent, that’s how you have to live when you’re in a society. And in a space with a lot of young people and social outcasts (which I am both of) who are both more likely to express frustration beyond what’s productive and more likely to feel hurt by others’ frustration, it’s necessary for this to be enforced by rules and moderation.
It’s not really possible to have a 1. large, open community space 2. where people feel like they can express all their feelings unrestrained and 3. where there aren’t instances of people getting hurt by others’ tilt and frustration like in the postgames you mentioned. It’s a tradeoff, and one you’re finding frustrations on both sides of. Those frustrations are understandable, but I don’t think there’s a solution that wins all three sides of it. Suppress emotions, be on the receiving end of others’ emotions, or deal with a ton of bans - those are the options, really.
*Not sure how much I succeed
8 Likes
I haven’t really read any of this but I disagree with Katze
10 Likes
The best part of FM is you scum read someone, then they proceed to blow your scum read out of the water doing something undeniably towny 
.
Wazza,
I would implore you to look for other sites and communities, to see how they run and how they handle things, to study and figure out what exactly you don’t like about FoL. Speaking as someone who’s homesite is
no longer FoL, I can cheerily say that I’ve found what’s right for me. A mostly stable community with excellent moderator-to-user relations. Of course, the site’s pace is slow, much slower than FoLers would be used to. It is a forum-board, after all.
While I won’t directly recruit here, I do want you to look out for other Mafia sites and see what is available, try finding other communities and try vibing with them, you know? The worst that can happen is that you end up back here with more knowledge, yeah?
3 Likes