is it
ur mom
Yes
I have the power of parental love on my side 
may i insert the most blursed yo mamma joke ever here
tro bad news
both my parents are awful
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wait
tro
this is a lv up experience we could have
we could help take care of golem
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aww
psychopathic bird vampire babysitters
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call us if your baby keeps dying whenever they are watched by other people
you should definitely let them watch your child q
nothing could go wrong
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my babysitter is a vampire
isn’t that the name of a show
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We are the epitome of baby sitters
we can even revive the kids that accidentally die on our watch
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i promise i won’t eat your child
…I make no such promises
I promise that your kid will be alive by the time you come home
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yeah
doesn’t matter what happens along the way if the kids alive!
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i won’t stop you if you want to eat something fun
i love ingesting random things and/or substances
that’s not a good thing tro
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it’s fun
(there’s a nonzero chance the bear launches me into the trap anyways)
(one of the disadvantages of weighing less than an ambitious textbook is that I get yeeted pretty easily)
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the past tense of yeet is yote
(I have, as the kids say, ‘been rekt’)
(brb having a midlife crisis)
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